Things You'd Never Hear In PotC

Originally it is a game where potc-fans get to rub their creative and fun-filled braincells to make up sentences/lines that you'd never hear
a character in Pirates Of The Caribbean say!

Thanks to the people who let us use their funny creations for this site!

By Aqua Tears
Jack: *takes a huge swig of rum then spits it all over the camera* "What IS this
stuff? It's absolutely VULGAR! Waiter, can I get some champagne?"

By Carly
*just afters Elizabeth 'accepts' the comodores proposal*
Jack: A wedding I love weddings... the calming music, beautiful dresses... but the one thing I cannot stand is the ammount of alcohol comsumed.

*Elizabeth falls off the cliff, Norrington goes to jump in after her*
Gillette: NO! Sir, your hair, it's a mircle you got it to go right in the first place!
Norrington: True, it does look rather good today, I mean its not like she's going to get resuced by a pirate who we're then going to have to chase half way across the world, and when we finally catch him and have him in the noose he escapes.
Gilette: Haha! Good one, sir.

By Carly and Clare
*Will goes to kiss Elizabeth*
Elizabeth: Noooooooooooooooooo I can't kiss you................. You've got hat hair.

By Clare
*Jack luks at norrington*
Jack: I like your hair.
Norrington: Thanks.
Jack: You should maybe try straightners though...
*Norrington looks sad*

By Hannah
Norrington: Has he said anything?
Young Elizabeth: Yes, he wants one BigMac and a Vanilla milkshake. That's all I found out.

By Jacksblackpearl
Cotton: "Hello ladies and gentleman, IT WAS A JOKE, I just folded my tongue!'

By Jacky
Jack: "...you forgot one very important thing mate.. I'm Jack Sparrow!"
Barbossa: *corrects him* "...Captain, CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow."

Jack: "Parschn... Parsl... Parsnip.. Parr..." *sighs* "Hold on, lemme google that."

Jack: "..it's a matter of leverage, ey?" *nods in Wills direction*
Gibbs: "...I still don't get it."
Jack: *whacks head on table*

~on the island, after Elizabeth and Jack got marooned~
Jack: *cleaning his pistol carefully* "Hmmhmm.. what's this for?" *accidently pulls the trigger and shoots his own foot* "SH!T!!! TEN YEARS I CARRIED THAT D@MN THING!! Sh!t!!!!!!"

~At the gallows~
Navy official: "....For your willful commission of crimes against the crown. Said
crimes being numerous in quantity and sinister in nature, the most egregious of these to be
cited herewith: piracy, smuggling, conspiricy with ducklins, shaving the governor's legs
when he had not asked for it, walking around in women clothes, digging incredibly deep holes
in the beach of Port Royal..."
Jack: "Oh yes, that was one hell of a hole."
Navy official: "..pirating DVD'S, CD's and VHS's, swimming nude in public, eating musturd soup with a fork.."

Barbossa: "How the blazes did you get off that island?"
Jack Sparrow: "When you marooned me on that god forsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate... the ship. You left it there. Moron." *rolls eyes*

Pintel: "Ragetti.. I love it when you talk stupid to me" *blinks eyelashes rapidly*

Estrella: "There you go, Miss. It was a difficult day for you, I'm sure."
Elizabeth: "I suspected Commodore Norrington would propose but I must admit, I wasn't entirely prepared for it."
Estrella: "Well, I meant you being threatened by that pirate. Sounds terrifying!"
Elizabeth: "Oh, yes... and he touched my boob, too!" *giggles*

By Linda
Elizabeth:"How did you escape last time?"
Jack:"Last time...I drank too much rum, fell uncounsciouss on the beach, the waves
dragged my helpless body into the ocean and carried me back to a more civilized spit of
Island where I married a wench, killed a bartender, got into jail, escaped jail and then
got three kids, settled down and lived happily ever after!"

Jack: "That's the second time I've ever watched that man sail away with my ship.
.....Good thing I blew holes in it" *sees it starting to sink by the horizon* "Yep, and there goes the neighbourhood"

Grapple: "Say goodbye."
Will Turner: *opens mouth* "..." *panics* "I'VE FORGOT HOW!!"

*cannonball crashes into The Pearl where Jack is in the brig*
Jack:"Finally some fresh air!"

Mr. Gibbs: "Then, on the fourth day, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles, lashed
'em together and made a raft."
Will Turner: "He roped a couple of sea turtles."
Mr. Gibbs: "Aye. Sea turtles."
Will Turner: "What did he use for rope?"
Jack Sparrow: "Human-hair...from my *beep* ...Oh sh!t, no sorry I meant my BACK!
From my BACK!"
*Will and Gibbs taking steps backwards*

Jack: "Just hear me out, mate. You order your men to row out to the Dauntless; they do what they do best. Robert s your Uncle Fannies your Aunt, there you are with two ships!
*silent*
*frowns*
*looks at Barbossa* Don't ask"

Gibbs: A lot of good it did them. Everyone’s thinking it. I’m just saying it. Pirates.
Governor Swann: There’s no proof of that. It was probably an accident.
*Everybody else on the ship raises an eyebrow and look at him sceptically*
Gibbs: ...what? They suddenly got hit by a meteor?

Jack sitting in the Cannibals big bowl ready to be food:
"Can I get Rum-marinated, please?"

Tia Dalma: "I knew the wind was gonna blow you back to me one day" (in her extreme accent)
Jack Sparrow: .....
Tia Dalma: "I knew the wind was gonna blow you back to me one day!"
Jack Sparrow: "....ye should actually go t' see a teatcher of sum sort tha' could teatch ye t' speak properly... seriously, I can't understand a word you're s-a-y-i-n-g!"

*when Jack is about to enter Tia Dalma's cottage*
Tia Dalma: "...... Will Turneeer.....!"
Jack Sparrow: "....no, it's actually me... Jack Sparrow"
Tia Dalma: "...oh damn these stupid fortune-tell-crab-claws! They're never showing the right thing! I'll never buy from that gypsy-market again!"

By Sanari Sebuna
Jack: "Yer no' a eunuch are ye?"
Will: "... yes..."

By Sarah
Elizabeth: "HOLY CRAP! WHAT DID I DO TO THE RUM?"

Jack: "Take what ye can..."
Will: *smile* "But remember to give it all back."
Jack: *loads gun*